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Penance
Civil Libertarian
Joined: 08 Mar 2008
Posts: 142
Location: Texas
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 Posted: Mon May 19, 2008 5:18 pm Post subject: Sobriety is not for everyone |
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and it clearly isn't for me. i've been sober now for 3 weeks and i feel miserable. i'll give some examples.
irritable
mood swings, i go from feeling so happy i could explode, to so depressed i want to kill myself all in about the span of an hour.
disintrested in life
lack of motivation
not even happy when with friends
i start something and tend to not finish
these arn't withdrawl symptoms, this is the real me. i felt so bad one night i nearly called up a friend for some pills and i hate pills. also i haven't used tobacco or alcohol as substitues. i havent touched a drink in...months and in the past 3 weeks i've smoked maybe 5 cigs if even that.
if i could toke i could stabalize myself and be normal and happy.would legalizing marijuana really be such a terrible thing?
and yes i realize this post is probably a jumble of incoheriant thougths, sadly this is me when i don't toke. |
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Brute4291
Mod-er-rater?
Joined: 01 Dec 2007
Posts: 637
Location: Zion
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| Posted: Mon May 19, 2008 6:52 pm Post subject: |
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| how long are you planning to go sober? |
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shortyflow
M.I.A.M.I
Joined: 24 Apr 2008
Posts: 593
Location: Porter Pot in Brazil
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| Posted: Mon May 19, 2008 7:04 pm Post subject: |
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You technically aren't sober because you are still having the thought process and still want to use. technically, you would be considered dry. sober is not something you try to do. It is a way of life.
went through alot of rehab at a young age |
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Penance
Civil Libertarian
Joined: 08 Mar 2008
Posts: 142
Location: Texas
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| Posted: Mon May 19, 2008 8:20 pm Post subject: |
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| Brute4291 wrote: | | how long are you planning to go sober? |
just till i can get a job.
and i "still want to use" because i know it will help me. it's like i can be stoned and sane, or "dry" and start killing people for fun, wich do you think is the better option?
i could just as easily go to a doctor and get a perscription for my mindstate, but i don't because i don't like pills. i CHOOSE to use marijuana. |
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shortyflow
M.I.A.M.I
Joined: 24 Apr 2008
Posts: 593
Location: Porter Pot in Brazil
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| Posted: Tue May 20, 2008 9:58 am Post subject: |
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| Not being a dick man. there is just a difference between sobriety and abstaining. it sucks you have to stop smoking for a job. i choose to smoke or I would be just like you and miserable |
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Lushh
Civil Libertarian
Joined: 13 May 2008
Posts: 138
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| Posted: Tue May 20, 2008 4:53 pm Post subject: |
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| Sorry that your having a dilemma. Marijuana is a natural antidepressant and anxiety reliever. Its helped lots of people for the similar reasons your thinking of. Honestly, if you are having the same problems with it get marinol, its synthetic THC in a smaller dosage. Don't abuse pills because that can really fuck up your insides. I'd suggest if you must find something, invest in a hookah. And when you do go back to smoking cannabis you can use the hookah. Not to sound like a dick but, marijuana isn't physically nor emotionally addictive. Have a little self control, and consider it a tolerance break. Next time you smoke after a month or two, it will be like you just started all over again. Getting high on small amounts is great and epic. |
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Penance
Civil Libertarian
Joined: 08 Mar 2008
Posts: 142
Location: Texas
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| Posted: Tue May 20, 2008 5:23 pm Post subject: |
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| pass on the hooka, i've got my bong, i'm happy. |
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Penance
Civil Libertarian
Joined: 08 Mar 2008
Posts: 142
Location: Texas
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| Posted: Tue May 27, 2008 10:49 pm Post subject: |
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| well, it's been over a month and i'm finnaly stoned again. i feel great. its like once i got high EVERYTHING wen't right in my life. |
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progrocker
Antiprohibitionist
Joined: 13 Jan 2008
Posts: 96
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| Posted: Wed May 28, 2008 2:15 am Post subject: |
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I'm quitting.
Today is day 2.
I wanna see how it affects my life. |
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Penance
Civil Libertarian
Joined: 08 Mar 2008
Posts: 142
Location: Texas
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| Posted: Wed May 28, 2008 12:31 pm Post subject: |
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| best of luck to ya. sobriety just isn't for me. |
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Antifa
Antiprohibitionist
Joined: 25 Mar 2008
Posts: 65
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| Posted: Wed May 28, 2008 1:54 pm Post subject: |
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When I was on probation I felt exactly the way you did...
But mostly I was under a ton of stress.. I was taking 4 college courses and working 40+ hours a week. Trying to fit my officer's odd meeting times(he was a real cunt about this and was always late) He almost cost me my job on several occasions... The 40 hours of community service.. The evaluations and awareness classes..
I drank alot and the 1-2 combination of that and the stress made me gain about 10 pounds(which I later lost).
Early release saved my ass.. 6 more months would've killed me.. My friends threw a party for me the day I found out I was free. That first bong hit felt so good.
I've never gone back to smoking on the level I did before I got arrested.. It's social thing for me now. I go weeks or months between smoking now. |
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Lushh
Civil Libertarian
Joined: 13 May 2008
Posts: 138
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| Posted: Wed May 28, 2008 5:00 pm Post subject: |
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Marijuana is less addictive than caffeine.
Trust me, if you take a 12 day break, and then smoke some of that shit from the mountains, OMG... |
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Brute4291
Mod-er-rater?
Joined: 01 Dec 2007
Posts: 637
Location: Zion
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| Posted: Wed May 28, 2008 8:35 pm Post subject: |
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Ive smoked about a year straight everyday.
One hit still gets me high. I love it haha |
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socrateez
Unknown Tipster
Joined: 01 Feb 2008
Posts: 1368
Location: Duh,...Its anonymous!
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| Posted: Thu May 29, 2008 9:28 am Post subject: |
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Abstinence. Tried it many times. I started smoking at 13(don't recommend it)It relieved a lot of social introversion and anxiety. It created some social anxiety due to its legality.(This is why I believe inexperienced smokers are paranoid prone) Starting at that age also meant that I soon became dependent on Cannabis to facilitate social interaction and mediate anxiety and depression. It was better than being completely ostracized and suicidal. It helps me tolerate the intolerable, whatever it is, mental or physical. That is its medicine.
Looking back on my life, the most traumatizing and chaotic events in my life occurred while abstinent. I took risks and made decisions while dry, that I wouldn't consider high. I even committed crimes while abstinent. 
I have been abstinent for periods of a few months to the most was about six years. Ive also abused for similar periods. I smoke all day if possible, so I do abuse by definition. Shouldnt a person in pain take as much medicine as works? By the way, I'm not a pill person, but diazapams work wonders in me similarly. They cloud my mind and sedate my body far more than Cannabis though. I don't trust them...
At the highest consumption rate Ive ever been able to maintain for length, the negatives for me are not distinguishable from environmental causes. (Social, Economic, ETC..) At worst I come full circle and it becomes ineffective at high usage. I still get "high" but the antidepressant and anti anxiety effects are no more. Social anxiety creeps back, depression seeps in. I am left with a Chicken and the Egg scenario:
Which came first? The Pot Use or the Depression? Which is the originator of the "Downward Spiral"? I know that answer since ive suffered depression since early childhood. Way before trying pot. I am of the opinion that pot has helped me ride through some periods in my life that may have been far more destructive without it.
I feel it has allowed me to have a degree of conformity and functionality in our society that I would otherwise not have had at times. That has had some cost due again to legality not abuse. Whats abuse to you is medicine to me.
It's not so much the high I want, that's nice and all, it's the normalcy it brings me.  |
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Brute4291
Mod-er-rater?
Joined: 01 Dec 2007
Posts: 637
Location: Zion
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| Posted: Thu May 29, 2008 8:17 pm Post subject: |
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One thing pot has done for me is show me the good in things. Soemthing as simply as being alive or interacting with someone else.
Honestly how can someone be an optimist, when all the headline you see are negative. Wars and hunger, i mean wow people suffereing I personally have never seen the front of a war or starved for weeks at a time.
One thing I've had to do for friends and family is cheer them up when they are sad and just be there when they need someone. Even as a child i had to be there for my mom when my parents got divorced and when her uncle died. My girlfriends father also died around middle school and yours truly had to help her out.
This started to burn me out how could i stay happy when so many people are suffering. Once i started smoking pot everything was different, it makes me feel like a kid again. With a cheerful optimistic attitude.
Now that i do smoke i am a very amiable guy, if you ask me for help ill give it too. It has also shown me how to accept peoples flaws, and in turn i have turned into a much better person. |
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